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Rock and a Hard Place

answered 10:58 AM EST, Tue June 23, 2015

sachetby

Hi, I need help with my 33 year old son. He is an alcoholic. He was attending AA he has relapsed been drunk continusly for 7 days. both his sister and I told him that he had the choice to stop drinking, call rehabs or he must leave. We can't get him to do anything. He just ignores us, and drinks more till he passes out. He won't leave. He knows that we are not physically able to pick him up and boot him out, so he locks his door to his room and drinks until he passes out. I don't know where he is getting the money? . He is deliberately disrespecting our ultimatum. I have no other family members or help to "get him to do something" I am disabled, not financially able to provide insurance for him. He does have medi-cal, I need support and physical assistance with him. He won't go to AA, call rehabs, or leave. Help me please. We have 7 days down of his drinking- doing nothing. Not working, Nothing but getting messed up. Help please.

Jim LaPierre Says...

J. LaPierre

LCSW, CCS

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My heart goes out to you and your family. I've known a lot of good people who find themselves in a place of having no good options. My best guidance to you is to meet with a member of your local police department and ask for their guidance. My guess is that it will take legal action to have him removed from your home (which at this stage, I fear is the only option). If you find the police to be unsupportive, please contact your district attorney and ask what steps to take.

Sadly, I see no reason to believe that this situation will improve as long as he remains in your home. In all my work with addiction I have only found two motivators for change - Suffering and Spiritual Awakenings.

My heart goes out to you as I know this must be very painful, but please know that providing him shelter, food, or in any way preventing him from suffering is the worst thing you can do. Blessed be and please email me if I can be of further help. [email protected] Best, JIm

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Page last updated Jun 23, 2015