Gambling addiction "in moderation"

Even in the world of alcoholism there are programs that support moderation or harm reduction. This is about taking steps to mitigate the disastrous harm an addiction will cause, i.e., using clean needles instead of dirty ones, not keeping alcohol in the house etc.

What I am hearing is that you have dug yourself in pretty deep. Perhaps you have gotten out of the financial mess gambling creates- if so that is great. But from what you write, you are in the hole and instead of digging with a shovel you want to dig with a spoon. Unfortunately, that means you are still digging.

The other issue of concern is that you are living a double life. You family is not aware of how bad things have become. It is amazing what happens when we face the fear and at the very least become emotionally and mentally clean with the wreckage of our lives.

So let’s step out of the gambling issue for a moment. Aside from gambling, what are you doing for your financial health? You have to eliminate the fantasy that one big win will fill in the hole. You know the odds on that are not good. Do you have a budget? Are you dealing with loan sharks or bookies? Are you living above your means to maintain your double life? Taking action and cleaning those issues up can help. It may mean dropping out of school and getting a job or two. You must take responsibility for the damage you have already caused.

You might want to look into programs like Smart Recovery. It is not GA but it is an approach to help you deal with the addictive thinking.

No matter how you deal with it, the urge to gamble will be there. If you do not act responsibly and stop lying to yourself and others you will have a hard time getting out of the hole.